I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I checked into jail on foursquare
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Randomize