Define "chronic" masturbator.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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