I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
She's the barista slut.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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