No awkward lesbian experiences without me
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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