I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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