So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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