Pappa wants mamma naked
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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