I want to stick my p in your. b.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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