so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
