Do you still have your period?
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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