fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
