So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
