Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
