i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
