i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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