john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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