i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
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