Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I think I sprained my soul last night
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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