I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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