my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
