Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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