and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
