she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I didn't shave. On purpose
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
