I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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