i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
