he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
