The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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