But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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