like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
