You're my little dorito
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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