The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize
