Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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