I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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