you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
