My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?�
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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