I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
