Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
