dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Someone came in the potted fern
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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