well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
He's a Shit stain on my heart
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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