Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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