we have pet lesbian snakes
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
of course. lets lasso hookers.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
i think i just lost a toe
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