Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
