How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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