Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
