Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
