Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
