Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
