I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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