Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
