If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize
